To Dancing, Music, and Surrendering...

I surrender myself to this day, and now to this night. It is late again; apparently the only time I ever feel inspired to conspire with words I seem to acquire in the low-lit skies as those outside.

I've given my notice, the first step is taken. Three weeks from now it will be boxes and packing tape, moving and phone calls and goodbyes and farewells. How is it all such a magical transition from something that surfaces mere mediocrity, slightly above the average circumstance? I tell you, it is because I have gained and strained to remain focused on the qualities of life contained.

Nothing says you all cannot do this. Listen and look carefully. A dear friend of mine and I always speak of these things. The qualities of life. It is not something that can be extracted from life, and it is not something that can be obtained. It is something that "is" and only "is." It is the point at which subject and object meet, and are thus created, in a sense. The Quality of life, my friends.

So tonight I danced; released myself from every ounce of exausted worry and frustration to be in the quality of the moment. I love to dance. It is not because I like the music I dance to, or the social engagement it is appealed to. It is a form of surrender. I once heard a story of dancing, and it has stuck with me since, though from what exactly I can't recall.

A little town was collectively in frustrations. All the people of the town gathered to the temple with the news that a high Rabbi was to visit one day of mass. Shortly before the Rabbi appeared in the temple, the assembly was in commotions over all of their problems, social, local, and personal. When the Rabbi appeared, everyone began to quickly gather around him in the hopes for answers and to ask their questions, and to vocalize their concerns. Upon seeing these people, the Rabbi began to sing. While he sang, he slowly broke into dance. The people, though slightly confused, began to join him. After a time, the entire assembly was singing and dancing just as the Rabbi. Shortly after, the dancing slowly died down and the room was peaceful. The Rabbi conclusively stated, "your problems are solved." The people began to thank him dearly and smile and shake hands with one another and be happy again.

It is one of my favorite little stories. I almost feel no need to even explain the meaning of it to you.

I didn't feel that kind of resplendence, but it was not far from it. It is all interconnected with the meanings of life and how you should care to more examine yourself in relation to that great and vast universe around you. Start small, and grow outward. before you know it you will have considered things not yet imagined, and continually find yourself in awe of those surroundings. Now, I know it would not be realistic to say that one could achieve this sort of attainment and perception every waking moment, but one could now and again remind themselves of such a thing.

My dear friend of mine and I discuss how there must be an even balance between anylitical and social thought process. Have you ever noticed an extremely intelligent, anylitical individual in a crowded social environment? It is almost as if they are permanantly detached from their surroundings, however it is precisely the opposite. They are too involved with their surroundings to be engaged in the social activity. More than it being a state of mind, it is an absence of an entirely different perspective of perception; of understanding. Perhaps I am talking nonsense now, but since this is my blog, I will do what I damn well please, since no one has apted to prove me wrong or form an opinion on the matter.

You silly bastards, say something, have an opinion. Don't become part of the numbing decay and overly cautious PC society that is being created these days out of too many people afraid to speak their real thoughts on the various matters. In the words of motherfuckin' En Vogue, "Free your mind, and the rest will follow!"

What more is there to say? It's three-thirty in the morning and I am sitting in a cold, empty coffee shop with a little music, some cigarettes and my vomiting mind for you to enjoy. Spasm after spasm the words are piled onto the clean white surface of this electronic page, and if I'm lucky, it will someday be acknowledged by the poor son of a bitch who steps in this mess and stops for a moment to scrape it off and anylize. Oh, the delicious visual-imagery astounds me so.

FACTS OF THE NIGHT:
My car is finally telling me to "go to hell" by deciding not to shift into proper gear at nearly every accelleration. I left my cell phone at the club, and now am phone-less for the greater part of today, after I go to bed and wake up, of course. I'm not really a big fan of cell phones, minus the menial uses provided, but it is my only way of communication with the outside world, being that I have no land line or internet access at my humble abode. Other than that bullshit, I have some cash in my pocket and a nice feeling in my head to take with me to sleep.

Nature without check with original energy, my friends.

-C